Let me clear my throat.
I really hate the cold i have had for the last couple weeks
I want it to be over with so I can take a deep breath without having to cough so hard that I feel my brain convulsing every time I do. What the hell? I thought cold's only happened in winter?
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
What do I think about blogging for creative writing?
I find that I have really enjoyed delving into the unique, or should I say different types of assignments that have raised rarely used thought processes for the blogging exercise. I did not realize that I would have to actually write so much this semester, on blogger, or in class, but I have truly enjoyed the experience. I will probably continue to write on blogger just to keep writing as it has brought out some sense of pride in the fact that I can write. I can write. Thank you
Sunday, April 28, 2013
O alcohol
What do I owe you, and how much you have quelled my inner wonder? These questions have been asked and answered by my own mind many a time over the years.
As I lift the near empty piece of aluminum, I wonder when I started to delve myself fully physically and mentally into your embrace. Why do I enjoy your company as much as I do? And in the same moment I feel as if you are my greatest enemy. O alcohol, why must I love you?
The realization that I am a drunk, and that I live in an geological area that is full of drunks, I am without the barrier of most to see the error in the life that I lead. I have been sober, and I like being sober but I cannot be without something. Everyone has, NEEDS something. A vice, and my body has chosen its own.
I just had the thought that NEEDS looks like it shouldn't be a word, are all words as strange looking?
As I lift the near empty piece of aluminum, I wonder when I started to delve myself fully physically and mentally into your embrace. Why do I enjoy your company as much as I do? And in the same moment I feel as if you are my greatest enemy. O alcohol, why must I love you?
The realization that I am a drunk, and that I live in an geological area that is full of drunks, I am without the barrier of most to see the error in the life that I lead. I have been sober, and I like being sober but I cannot be without something. Everyone has, NEEDS something. A vice, and my body has chosen its own.
I just had the thought that NEEDS looks like it shouldn't be a word, are all words as strange looking?
Monday, April 22, 2013
Feeling
Feel
What a weird thing. This sense is caused by nerves inside your body that send electrical impulses to your brain via the bodies central nervous system. Feel alerts your body of dangers, of temperatures that are too hot or too cold, of things that are sharp or dull, or minor pains that amount to much larger things.
Feel also alerts a person of the things that the human body seeks. The soft caress of a loved one, the nurturing comfort of a mothers hug, or the relaxation of that comes with sitting in a cushy chair.
Right now I feel a little cold, but not so much that I will bundle up. I have been sitting on my office chair for the last hour and I feel my legs tightening up and my butt falling asleep. I feel the weight of the atmosphere as it presses down upon my body, reminding me that I am overweight and need to get my ass to the gym.
Feel is as physical as it is emotional.
What a weird thing. This sense is caused by nerves inside your body that send electrical impulses to your brain via the bodies central nervous system. Feel alerts your body of dangers, of temperatures that are too hot or too cold, of things that are sharp or dull, or minor pains that amount to much larger things.
Feel also alerts a person of the things that the human body seeks. The soft caress of a loved one, the nurturing comfort of a mothers hug, or the relaxation of that comes with sitting in a cushy chair.
Right now I feel a little cold, but not so much that I will bundle up. I have been sitting on my office chair for the last hour and I feel my legs tightening up and my butt falling asleep. I feel the weight of the atmosphere as it presses down upon my body, reminding me that I am overweight and need to get my ass to the gym.
Feel is as physical as it is emotional.
Remembered conversation
"You understand that you will need to be in intensive rehabilitation sessions to regain your muscle mass, and that you may never walk again" my doctor stated slowly.
"I will heal, and I will regain the use of my leg. I cannot afford rehab but I will build myself again." I told my doctor defiantly, laying on my back with my leg raised above me.
"Ryan, you will need to be extra cautious. This will take years to heal and you cannot rush your recovery." trying to instill some reality into my situation, my doctor looked straight into my eyes as he spoke. "You are lucky to still have your leg as it is."
"No, I am lucky to have had a great surgeon,without whom I would not have my leg" I said, sitting up as far as I could so he could see the sincerity in my eyes as they started watering. "I will use my leg again, and I will learn to walk again." I said, promising to my doctor as much as to myself.
"I will heal, and I will regain the use of my leg. I cannot afford rehab but I will build myself again." I told my doctor defiantly, laying on my back with my leg raised above me.
"Ryan, you will need to be extra cautious. This will take years to heal and you cannot rush your recovery." trying to instill some reality into my situation, my doctor looked straight into my eyes as he spoke. "You are lucky to still have your leg as it is."
"No, I am lucky to have had a great surgeon,without whom I would not have my leg" I said, sitting up as far as I could so he could see the sincerity in my eyes as they started watering. "I will use my leg again, and I will learn to walk again." I said, promising to my doctor as much as to myself.
Saturday, March 30, 2013
Land For Sale
For Sale: Four acres of land, west side of Argusville, ND. Exit 78 off I-29 701-***-****
He cannot believe it, he finally found a place to call home. He has been working towards building his own house, scraping together every penny that he can. It hasn't been easy to resist temptation, the draw of buying a new vehicle or renting a nice cushy hotel room, instead driving the same beat up old pickup and dragging around the worn out camper where he sleeps. Getting work wherever is possible, mostly farm hand labor, helping others achieve their dreams with his hard work, hoping to have a fraction of what they own some day. He is optimistic this day as he drags his equally hard working truck down a bumpy, well worn gravel road. As he nears the plot for sale, he feels at peace, finally feeling like he is at home.
Rounding the last turn, he sees everything that he has dreamed of. A wide, green field surrounded by a long shelter belt of tall, healthy trees. He can picture where he will place the single story, sprawled out house he will build with his own two hands. The barn where he will house his animals and equipment. He even sees the beautiful wife he will have someday, waving to him as he pulls into their driveway, cradling their newborn baby boy named for his father.
With a silent tear sliding down his right cheek, he takes a deep breath and exits the old truck. He is home.
He cannot believe it, he finally found a place to call home. He has been working towards building his own house, scraping together every penny that he can. It hasn't been easy to resist temptation, the draw of buying a new vehicle or renting a nice cushy hotel room, instead driving the same beat up old pickup and dragging around the worn out camper where he sleeps. Getting work wherever is possible, mostly farm hand labor, helping others achieve their dreams with his hard work, hoping to have a fraction of what they own some day. He is optimistic this day as he drags his equally hard working truck down a bumpy, well worn gravel road. As he nears the plot for sale, he feels at peace, finally feeling like he is at home.
Rounding the last turn, he sees everything that he has dreamed of. A wide, green field surrounded by a long shelter belt of tall, healthy trees. He can picture where he will place the single story, sprawled out house he will build with his own two hands. The barn where he will house his animals and equipment. He even sees the beautiful wife he will have someday, waving to him as he pulls into their driveway, cradling their newborn baby boy named for his father.
With a silent tear sliding down his right cheek, he takes a deep breath and exits the old truck. He is home.
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Spring Break Forks Style
So, today I have decided to spend a bunch of money on my car. A little maintenance goes a long way, the only problem is I will be without a car for a day or so, not that big of deal, but this prompts me to re-install the battery in my truck and get that running. It's a tough old bird, sitting and waiting for me to drive it again. I had to move about 500 lbs of snow just to get to it. Exercise does a body good. I am excited for summer weather so I can take it out on dirt roads and get to the good fishing spots, or go shoot my gun, or just haul some wood for a project I may have. All only possible if I can get it running. Eh, no problem.
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